Archive for the ‘I Am No Longer In Total Control’ Category

Ezra’s Step Stool

Wednesday, December 2nd, 2009

Ezra has a step stool for bathroom, kitchen, dinning room. During the past, Valerie and i would usually need to carry Ezra’s step stool around from the kitchen sink, the dishwasher, his table, to the chair at the big table, so he could wash hands, unload the dishwasher, let -v- or I sit, or climb to his chair at the big table.

Now he carries his own stool.

Now he carries his own stool to new places like a movable cart in kitchen for fruit or to the drawers for a spoon or the the counter tops for his binky or for the sink in bathroom, to unload the dishwasher, for a seat, to use to step to the big chair.

Now he can get to those places where I thought he wouldn’t be for a couple more months or years.

Middle Management

Friday, October 23rd, 2009

Ezra told me, ,,Círculo,” to help him build a circle with the wooden train track. Typically this circle then becomes the boundary of a parking or living area for cars and trucks. So, we were building the círculo of track and then he said for me to, ”Do this,” but, ”Do this,” meant doing something that wouldn’t have helped create the círculo of track. So, I tried to explain to him that we couldn’t make a circle if we laid the track the way he was wanting it to be laid. He said, ”Do this, do this,” and laid the track to make a wavy train line away from the incomplete circle then he began telling me to, ”Círculo, círculo. Círculo,” but he also wanted me to, ”Do this,” and I didn’t know what to do because there wan’t enough track despite getting 100 new pieces to make a círculo while laying track away from the point of the original círculo plan.

There Is No Decision Chart For A Two Year Old

Wednesday, October 14th, 2009

Today it took some topical cream in Ezra’s bum, two diapers changes to find the right diaper Ezra wanted, reading three books, playing with his trucks, fussing it out for a few minutes, then another diaper change for the diaper he selected, then have -v- and me  help build a car garage, then he was near happy. To get him finally out the door, it took him looking at a big book with stickers in the book and getting a sticker of a transport truck stuck to his favorite John Deer tractor t-shirt, which he had been wearing since yesterday, but this morning was no morning to ask him to take off his favorite shirt and put on a new shirt.

Cars

Monday, September 28th, 2009

Ezra’s new favorite movie is Cars. It combines some of his favorite things like cars, noises and cartoons. He likes it enough that is even subduing any fussiness he may have from not being home and for it being too cold to go to the park, and the movie even subdued him during plane flight. The only thing I don’t like about this like of the movie Cars is the fact he may want to watch it often and every time we let him watch videos, which means I have to watch it or hear it.

…And Then Some Nights Are Like Tonight.

Tuesday, September 15th, 2009

Just as a clingy tired-looking whining Ezra was excited to eat his hamburger and potatoes, mommy had to leave. What followed was not expected…

He then didn’t’ want to eat the hamburger, the potatoes, a waffle, a pancake, an egg, cereal, cheese, apple, peaches, raisins, a fig bar, a tomato, crackers, ham, olives or a cookie. A cookie. EZRA REFUSED TO EAT A COOKIE! He didn’t want to play trains, read a book, watch Youtube, watch television, play with Play-Doh, listen to music, eat. I thought maybe he had a fever, but his temperature was and is fine except for the fact he was heated with crying emotion as he looked outside for mommy, as he picked up mommy’s keys and cried for mommy, as he sat on the couch and cried for mommy, as he stood by the door and cried for mommy. So I offered him a puppy. He said, ,,No puppy.” Instead, he insisted on crying loud and long and clear creating a loud song for the entire neighborhood. It was a song of crying with the lyrics. ”MOMMY, MOMMY, MOMMY. I WANT MY MOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMY!” It was song that had me speechless and wanting to scream, which I did into a pillow, after I sang a song using the music from Twinkle Twinkly Little Star, but with different lyrics because if I sung the lyrics to Twinkle Twinkle Little Star Ezra sung his song louder because mommy sings Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. …Actually, his wasn’t a song. A song is too short. It was more of an opera that lasted an hour and a half.

Whaus?

Monday, September 14th, 2009

Whaus = Ezra’s Speak for, ,,What is this?” Or ,,What’s this?” Whaus is usually accompanied with a point of finger at an object or to his ear (to represents the object is a sound).

It was learned over time by Ezra saying, ,,What’s this?” with a binky in his mouth.

Every time whaus is said, I say, ,,What is this?” Or at least I try. Ezra can say Whaus for many object before I can say, ”What is this?” making me feel it is more important to clearly define all the object he is curious about than use time to help unlearn a non-standard word.

Pee In The Potty

Monday, August 10th, 2009

Ezra’s potty training is slow going. So far, the only time he has any desire to try to sit on his potty to pee or poop just happens to be as he is laying in his bed, against his desire, to go to sleep for the night. No other time does he really express the desire to go to the bathroom and sit on his potty. So for the past to nights as we laid him down he’s expressed a desire to go pee in the potty. Both times it resulted in us all sitting in the bathroom waiting for something to happen. What has happened is Ezra sits on the potty for a few seconds. Then he stands and walks around. Then he sits on the potty. He will try to play with the toilet paper. He will try to leave to go run around. Every time we tell him that if he wants to go pee in his potty that’s good, but it is not a reason to avoid going to bed. So we sit. We wait then we go back to his room, lay him on his bed and just about when things are calm he will ask again to go pee in his potty.

Ezra Likes Soap

Saturday, August 1st, 2009

He wants to lick his hands free of liquid soap when washing hands. He likes to drink soapy bath water. He sucks suds from wash cloth and likes it.

I suppose the liquid soap does look similar to the food condiments that we use for food, so I don’t fault him for wanting to try soap nor would I believe he liked soap if he happened to lick or try to lick the liquid soap from his hands once or twice, but he wants to lick his hand free of soap every time he washes hands rather than rinse the hands free of soap with the water flowing from faucet.

Stair Master 2

Friday, July 17th, 2009

Ezra may have become a Stair Master more than a year ago, and now he is a Stair Mater 2.

Yesterday, he earned his second Stair Master title after climbing and descending stairs without supervision from -v- and me. We were eating dinner, and he was roaming around. We heard him from afar asking something. I walked up the stairs to find him wanting into his room for he is still unable to open the high, old and stiff door knob. He entered his room, but refused me entry. He wanted -v- in his room, but not me. We wanted to eat, so we went back downstairs. Soon Ezra followed thus completing his solo ascent and descent of the steep wooden stairs without knowledge or supervision.

We still don’t have gates installed before the up and down entrances of the steep wooden stairs.

Image of Ezra Falling Down The Steep Wooden Stairs

Sunday, July 12th, 2009

Ezra tells me to, ,,Wait,” at the top of the steep and carpetless stairs for him to descend. Then he steps to the stairs, looks back to make sure I am far from the top of the stairs. He waits to makes sure I won’t be following him then he steps down.

Each step makes me nervous. He lifts foot and slowly lowers foot to the next stair. He leans against the wall and leans back while slowly bending the knee. The foot hits the stair below and the other foot slips from under and steps to the stair below with butt hitting the stair above. Then he stands.

When he is standing at stair’s edge, I get the most nervous because sometimes he just stands and stares and looks around. And while he looks around, I look at him and say, ,,Be careful, Ezra.” Then he says, ,,NO, DADDY. Wait.” He takes another step and another then another until he is at the bottom and then I am no longer worried he will miss step and fall head-first from wooden stair to wooden stair to wooden stair. Then I realize Ezra is grown-up and if anything I am going to cause him to lose focus and fall down the stairs because I am calling out his name and saying to him every step, ,,Be careful, Ezra.”

Stepping On Toys

Saturday, June 27th, 2009

Ezra’s toys are spread through the main living area, which is also the main walking area for it leads to the door outside, the kitchen and the stairs going up. The toys are blocks and wheeled objects. The blocks hurt more than the wheeled objects when stepping on them, but the wheeled objects can cause a slip. Or the wheeled objects will move to a new location changing the dynamic of the mess. I have tried to pick up the toys, but they return to the same area with in seconds if Ezra is awake. If Ezra is asleep, I usually don’t want to pick up toys during that time because I need to relax.

-v- I trying to convince me to leave the toys be for now. I think I will for there will be years to show him to cleanup, which he does on occasion.

The Diaper Was Thrown Down….

Thursday, June 11th, 2009

Like the a gauntlet thrown down, -v- tossed the diaper she tried to put on a mad fussin’ Ezra. Then she exhaled the tension from body and laid backed. And the diaper seemed to float for a second before it landed on the floor. Ezra won the strike, but not the duel of diaper and pants. He left for play care wearing diaper and pants.

Ezra’s Almost A Perfect Kid

Tuesday, June 9th, 2009

-v- wrote an email reading that Ezra is the perfect kid except for him not wanting to change, wear, not wear pants and or diaper.

I agree. He’s great in every way, but it is a fucking pain to get Ezra to change his pants or diaper. Getting pants or diaper off is a complete battle itself. He whines and kicks, jiggles, squirms, moans, pushes, says, ,,No,” swats and fusses. And with the other battle putting on the pants, pajama bottoms, shorts or underwear, it some times feels like a war. Shirts nearly fly on and off like a jet over his body with no to little fight when compared with the pants.

He has this favorite pair of pajama bottoms with choo-choo trains on them that he always wants to wear even to playcare. And he loves them, so they’re easy to get on, but then getting them off for another pair of pants or pajamas is between a negotiation and a battle that feels to last for a morning. While I do have to let -v- from time to time be The One changing Ezra’s pants for she doesn’t battle with him, I am becoming more calm and focused. Instead of getting angry for battle, I am trying to just think of the trains and truck camouflage pants and shorts that I want to make Ezra, and that Ezra would always wear and would always be happy to change. I see the pants like a collage of trains or trucks or motor cycles…

Poop and Mr. Bubble

Friday, June 5th, 2009

Today had been the first time in weeks Ezra had a bath with Mr. Bubbles, so I gave him a little extra bubble.

Today had been the first time Ezra pooped in the tub that I know of.

I cleaned the poop and Mr. Bubble. Hand and towel scooped poop that floated around the tub like it was a fish. One poop separated as I scooped it with paper towel and hand. Those chucks of poop streaked the tub and mixed with Mr. Bubble. Then the poop gathered in the drain. Bleach cleaned the steaks. A paper-towel-covered finger cleaned the poop from drain.

I was thankful the water and Mr. Bubble hid the fragrance.

Ezra May Pee On Fire Truck Bed

Saturday, May 30th, 2009

Ezra didn’t want to leave the park. Nor did he want to get into the bath tub. Then he didn’t want to leave the bath tub. After getting out of the bath tub Ezra didn’t want to wear his diaper or shorts or shirt. He wanted nothing more than to fuss loud and let us know he didn’t want to wear a diaper or shorts or shirt.

We did try to put his diaper on his body, but after a few wild shakes of Ezra we realized Ezra didn’t want to be clothed.

Ezra did fall asleep on his Fire Truck Bed. He has woke a couple times. He may wake again if he pees on the Fire Truck Bed.

Sometimes I Feel Like Ezra Believes Me To Be His Rival

Wednesday, May 20th, 2009

Maybe it’s when he pushes on me and says, ,,Nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnno,” with a long dramatic push, when I try to help him instead of -v- like today when I said I would pick him up from the ground because -v- was cooking, and Ezra wanted to be picked up. Maybe it is when he gives me the hand and says, ”No,” when I say I will watch videos with him instead of -v-. Maybe it’s the squirming and fussing he has when I try to get him out of the car seat instead of -v-.

He says these Nos and Don’ts when it involves me doing something with him instead of -v-, I feel, because by me doing it means he will have less time with -v-. I feel as if he feels I am taking time from -v-, like I am competing for -v-’s time.