Ezra Tiger Clawed me after i picked him up from the mat at the playground gym to take him to the shoe area to put on shoes to go home long after the gym needed close. -v- got Tiger Clawed after a misunderrstanding of how Ezra was going to exit the car to go shopping. Only -v- had a scratch though I felt the pain, too.
Ezra is in bed…not sure if he’s sleeping.
Tonight he didn’t want to stay in his room,
at least not at first. He said his bed was bad,
his room was bad, he was hungry, he wasn’t tired…
So after a trip downstairs for a slice of bread and butter
we went back upstairs and he started looking a
little tired but every time I thought he was sleeping
he was not. Eventually he let me leave the room but
I still don’t know if he’s sleeping
The day alone with sick and fussy Ezra was more work than my hardest days of money job. I said fuck four times. The forth fuck was a holy fuck that was said when I was starring out the window while sitting on the sofa mindless having had lost the mind talking with Ezra, playing with Ezra, trying to calm Ezra, feeding Ezra, changing Ezra, soothing Ezra from ear infection pain, convincing Ezra mom will come back and all during a few minutes.
Ahhhhhh! Ezra won’t wear a diaper, won’t wear a pull-up
But he will wear underpants.
But he won’t sit on the potty. Arrrrrgh!
I wish potty training was done
Ezra came home from Trader Joes with an orange balloon. When he arrived, I could feel his joy because Ezra loves having a balloon. He said, ,,Hi, daddy,” with a smile, which for the past days has been the only cheerful greeting he has given me. He was happy for he had his balloon.
Usually, the balloons will be played with for the night then the next day they will lose their air and deflate and then be thrown away by the third day. However, tonight there was no balloon play because he pulled the balloon string, and the balloon floated across the ceiling to the light. The balloon popped.
Ezra was not happy. He cried. He fussed. He wanted another balloon. He wanted to go back to Trader Joes to get another balloon. He wanted to know why it popped.
While -v- talked to him about the balloon, I began to search for a balloon I thought we might have. I searched and searched and searched and I found one balloon hidden in a junk drawer, and I thought, <This will make him like me more.> So, I took the balloon, and I walked over to Ezra, and I kneeled, and I blew.
The balloon expanded.
Ezra smiled and shouted with joy against the tears still on cheek, ,,DADDY MADE A BALLOON!”
And then I blew the balloon again to make a big balloon, and the fucking balloon popped.
We went to the store today to get Ezra a new movie. The only one he showed any interest in was the Cars movie. He didn’t say no to a Curious George movie. And he didn’t say no to the Ratatoullie movie…but he said no to all the other movies. So we came home with Curious George and the RatMovie. This evening Ezra agreed to sit and watch Curious George. We were excited. But it was not happening. About 5 minutess into the show Ezra realized that he was being subjected to an inferior movie and demanded Cars. So now I am watching the Cars movie for like the 10th time. Ka-chow!
Ezra and I stayed home together the
Last couple of days because of the ear
Infection. While we had a pretty good time
He was still a sick boy who was often tired
And more clingy than usual. But it was still
Nice to have time together with my sick boy.
-v- asked, ,,Are you pooping,” because Ezra did go quiet, and I did imagine Ezra’s pooping concentration. Ezra said, ,,I pee-pee on pants.”
Some how pee-pee spread from diaper onto his jogging suit pants to the floor during the morning time. No fright. I heard from main living area. I smiled and felt like a good parent for what Ezra said in words he had done for he had pee-pee on pants and he actually pee-peed on pants and on the floor. It was something to clean-up. We cleaned-up. I got new pants. And the morning went along. I did mention during car ride to pre-school that pee-peeing on or in toilet is fun, too. Thus he gave me the feeling that I was a good parent again.
By Ezra
The last two nights, Ezra has asked for the light to be left on at bed time.
Is he growing afraid of the dark or is this just another of his bedtime
Delaying tactics? I try to placate him by leaving the door ajar and the
Hall light on rather than leaving the light on in his room.
I’m really hoping he will not be afraid of the dark like I think I was!
Ezra woke fussing for mom. Normally, we let him fuss for he usually returns to sleep, but not only did he fuss a bit long, but also I was wondering if maybe he had peed or pooped in his underwear and found the absorbent nature of his underwear not as good as a diaper. So I woke and checked the underwear while having him ask for mom, but I talked on as I checked his underwear and then talked until he calmed and slept only to fuss for a few seconds calling for dad as I told him I was leaving.
Once all big things were Big Ones, but now everything big is big or huge. There have been huge rocks, huge trucks, huge planes, huge sticks and there have been huge poops, but no poops in the toilet.
Today we found a huge leaf during the walk to the park. The leaf was huge compared to the tiny shrub leaves that Ezra calls M & M’s that we passed during the walk to the park.
We will be getting Melissa and Doug’s Swivel Bridge Train Set
He should enjoy it. Now it needs only get here in time! 10 MORE DAYS!!!
Ezra wanted to go down the steps of the back porch by himself. He insisted. He’s descended many steps before. This time he misstepped despite being a Stair Master 2.
I turned in time to see it: Ezra’s face fall flat and first upon a wooden step. There was a THUMP. …And I dropped his toy dump truck and the bike helmets and picked up Ezra and walked around with Ezra as he fussed, cried until we found -v-. This was yesterday.
Today, his nose is a bit big and there are bruises. But his nose is not broke, and there was no blood. There was no concussion. There is no other obvious damage, but I feel bad. I feel bad because I didn’t catch him before he fell. I feel bad because I couldn’t help. I only hope his cute nose returns to normal after the slight swelling fades and the bruises disappear. I hope I resist the urge to insist he hold my hand down steps until he is five.
Ezra woke early. I reasoned he went night-night early, so he might wake early. I was walking up stairs with loud steps to go see if Ezra was awake and ready for the day. -v- Shhh’d me for Ezra was going back to sleep.
it’s been a rough few days but I think Ezra is now feeling almost like his old self. he’s still not eating a lot, but he’s back to his old tricks like not wanting to have his diaper changed and stuff like that, which he totally gave up on while he was sick. so it seems sort of safe to say that we made it through this illness relatively unscathed. yay! ezra went with me and gramma O today to go get new shoes. We went into the store and into the shoe aisle, and  I pulled out a pair of brown chucks that were 1 size up from the green ones he has now. I pulled off the green one on his right foot, and swapped it with the brown one. Ezra was totally stoked on the new shoes! he grabbed the right green shoe and threw it over his shoulder into the cart, and then asked to have the other green shoe off so that he could have the new brown shoes on…and as I looked at these new brown shoes, I thought ” hey, if he ever has diarrhea running down his leg and onto his shoe again (as he did this past weekend) it won’t be as noticeable on these brown shoes!”Â